So today is Day 11. . .

So last night, I watched the General Relief Society Meeting. Although I haven't been to church or watched any church programs in quite a while, I can say that I felt that still small voice of the Holy Ghost nudging me to watch/listen to it. I'm certain that Heavenly Father hasn't given up on me and because I watched/listened to the meeting, a few of the struggles I've been dealing with lately have been lifted from me for a time.

Matthew 18: 12-14
12 How think ye? if a man have an hundred ^asheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray?

13 And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray.

14 Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these ^alittle ones should ^bperish.

While I don't seem to be having nearly as bad as before body aches, I still have them. It seems my next phase is dizziness. I've been getting dizzy for the past few days. I'm still feeling exhausted but I'm getting through it. Sunday's are easiest to go without drinking because the liquor stores are closed here. Actually the only think you can purchase here on a Sunday is beer. I always preferred liquor instead of the watered down taste of beer. Ugh!

Today, Melissa, Mikey and I went to the mall. Mikey needed some new pants and shoes. I got a denim jacket and some tops and shoes. I wanted to get Melissa some shoes, but she couldn't find anything she liked. :-/

Oh, and with trying to quit alcohol, it seems I'm losing more weight so that's pretty exciting!  =))

Detoxing. . .

While there's a lot on the internet about alcoholism and detoxing, I really couldn't find much about body aches from detoxing. I'm sure it's there, I just don't have the patience or energy right now to search for it. Grrrr....

Well, I think last night was the worst it's been so far.

I was tired all day yesterday. I have very little energy...just like this past week. I have to force myself to do anything instead of just being a slug. I so looked forward to going to bed last night. I felt like I was going to sleep like a rock. Instead, I spent most of the night cat napping. I think I woke up every hour. What was the worst part though, was that my whole body was aching as if I had the flu. Every part of my body felt tense and and still does. I have to keep fighting this because I don't want to go thru this again. I know it will eventually pass and that I just have to ride it out, fight thru it!

I can do it! One second, one minute, one hour, one day at a time. I can do it....I can do it....

Day 8. . .

I really liked this tweet. . .

@high_on_glitter: Mission of the day: dance to your own beat.

PS...Day 7

5 days and Keeping busy

Today I had plans but only did 1 thing on my "to do" list. 

After I had a shower, I went and got some lunch and then went over to Target and bought an umbrella. Afterwards, I went came back to the house and picked up Melissa and we went to the mall. We both got things we needed...clothes...lol. We left the mall and then went to the super-market for some groceries.

Mike and Melissa made a lovely dinner and after Mikey went to bed, we went outside and had a fire in the fire pit. It was chilly but toasty sitting so close to the fire. Nice. We just came in and I'm just about to  end the day.

More errands for tomorrow :) 

A nice day. . .

Today I was still feeling blue and on the verge of tears...Still disappointed and hating myself.

Melissa asked if I wanted to go to Target with her to get Mikey's medicine. I told her no, but that she could take my car. Off they went, and when they got home, Melissa asked me if I wanted to go to, East Canyon or  Park City later. Honestly, my plans for the day were to stay down in the Batcave and feel sorry for myself and cry all day. I thought maybe I'd feel better if I went out. Even though I didn't want to go, I decided to go anyway. It would be good to get out of the house and "get away from myself." So off we went.....

We went to East Canyon first and then on to Park City for lunch. I had a lovely day and was able shove my problems to the back of my head for awhile. The fall colors of the mountains were beautiful!

Thanks, Melissa for getting my mind of things for a little while. XoXo

Each day is progress...

Day 3 =))

A New Day

Today is a new day and time to start over.

I sufficiently hate myself enough now to make a change. I pray that I can go forward from now on, instead of backwards.

Tomorrow I just may take a drive for some fresh air and hopefully get away from my self-loathing. We'll see.

Last post ever about, Ron Kennedy!

I finally unfriended you after realizing what a Coward and Jerk you are! BTW..the word is Banned, not banded. No way you were ever valedictorian and i didn't' believe you when told me that. The sad thing is, you've lied so much you actually believe your lies are true. Lastly, you aren't 6"..more like 4"